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A Miscellany 135
A Doppelganger Writes

by John W. Tyrrell

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One day while googling myself, I came across this church founded, oddly enough, by John Tyrrell. I thought I would remember doing something like creating my own church which had so perfectly stated the beliefs that I was never able to put into words. I called some of my drinking buddies and none of them remember helping me found a church either, However a friend brought up an incident that occurred last summer, when we (living in Seaford, New York) took a trip to Seaford, Delaware in search of our Doppelgangers. The search had no results and we left empty handed, however, after finding your church I'm not entirely satisfied that my search is over.

How probable is it that one of us is an evil twin? Isn't it just as likely that we are like minded individuals with the same names, beliefs and ideas? What else do we have in common? Let's not battle to the death just yet, I want to answer some of these questions first.

"Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer"

Since I don't know what to call you, friend or foe, and I believe whole heartedly in the church's ideals, my best course of action is to join the organization and establish contact with you in order to determine the nature of your existence in relation to me. Please don't take any of this as a threat, as I would like to avoid a battle to the death at all costs; Confirmation of your intentions not to ruin my life would be enough and I'll thank you for your time.

I would not ask for special treatment within the church, just a simple ordination in the clergy.  Please proceed with my application and continue to enjoy our kick-ass name.